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Gillard warns of zombies and hell beasts

Friday, December 07, 2012 » 09:32am


 
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PM Julia Gillard confirms the end of the world is coming and warns of flesh-eating zombies and hell beasts.

PM Julia Gillard confirms the end of the world is coming and warns of flesh-eating zombies and hell beasts.

 

The world is coming to an end but Prime Minister Julia Gillard is looking on the bright side: at least she won't have to appear on QA again.

Via a mock YouTube address to the nation, Ms Gillard has confirmed that the doomsayers are right and the apocalypse will hit this month.

'My dear remaining fellow Australians,' Ms Gillard says in a brief address posted on YouTube (www.youtube.com/watch?v-ebtj3gDaE64).

'The end of the world is coming.

'It wasn't Y2K, it wasn't even the carbon price. It turns out the Mayan calendar was true.'

Ms Gillard says that while the scientists at the CSIRO can't confirm the news, she is confident that alternative radio station Triple J's prediction is correct.

'Whether the final blow comes from flesh-eating zombies, demonic hell beasts or from the total triumph of K-Pop, if you know one thing about me, it's this: I will always fight for you to the very end,' she says with a straight-face, standing at a lectern and flanked by two Australian flags.

'And at least this means I won't have to do QA again.

'Good luck to you all.'

 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
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